Archive for 'Oregon St. Beavers'
OSU Defensive Back Popped For DUI and Eluding Police. Welp, Gee Golly
Posted on19. Feb, 2012 by Kinger.
Sean Martin, defensive back for the Oregon state football team, had the unfortunate luck of driving by the fuzz while all lit up Saturday night/Sunday Morning. But hey, like they preach on Saturday afternoons, never quit and never give up! There was no quit in Martin’s game (well maybe a little at the end) [...]
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Scumbag Mike Riley Says Someone Named Iso Sofele Is The Best Runningback In The Pac12
Posted on22. Nov, 2011 by Kinger.
On the weekly conference call, Mike Riley calls Doak Walker winning-LaMichael James nothing more than a system back. A product of the whimsical and gimmicky offense deployed by the dunderhead, Chip Kelly. Okay, maybe not in so many words, but we all know that’s what he was getting at. Later, Riley offered to buy Chip [...]
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Hippie OSU Students Rap About Planting Trees
Posted on22. Nov, 2011 by Kinger.
Typical tree-hugging OSU kids. All those hippies in Cowvallis just make me sick. Seriously, I know it’s an Ag school and all, but come on. These liberal earth people were probably high on marijuana and magic mushrooms at the time of taping. How else can you explain the irrational hatred of co2? Probably voted for [...]
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Hey guys, It’s Civil War Week! Watch Some Rednecks Shoot And Destroy An OSU Flag
Posted on21. Nov, 2011 by Kinger.
First of all, let me just say this is why I really never go camping anymore. You just never know when some white militia is out there with heavy artillery just blasting Beaver flags. Guns, machetes, booze and fucking fire bombs, dear god keep me away from these people. I realize they’re Duck fans, but [...]
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Hey Beaver fans, check this out! You’re the upset pick of the week!
Posted on19. Oct, 2011 by Kinger.
Sure, it’s been a tough year up in Mayberry. Smiley Riley and crew are now 1-5 (Chip Kelly has only 5 career losses, BTW) fans are keying the cars of their best player, and headed up to Seattle to play the Cougars. Yeah, you heard me right, Seattle. But fear not Beaver Gathering, Phil Steele [...]
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Want to see a Beavers game? You can do so for less than the price of a fifth of Cuervo
Posted on07. Sep, 2011 by Kinger.
One metric on a teams popularity is the price of the tickets that inevitably make their way onto the secondary ticket market. Using that metric, it appears the fans at Lunch Pail U aren’t too excited in ‘being orange while letting it rage’ as the Beavs lose yet another home game. The OSU remaining home [...]
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Depth chart dictates suspensions. Has Smiley Riley finally come to the dark side?
Posted on30. Aug, 2011 by Kinger.
Alright everybody, a round of applause of for Mr. Gee Golly Gosh himself. The King of El Paso and the Mayor of Mayberry, Mike Riley, may have finally “got it.” From Paul Buker of Oregonian: Riley might be second-guessed, but he’s decided not to suspend defensive tackle Castro Masaniai for Game 1. Masaniai was involved [...]
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Previewing the Pac-12 North: #5 Oregon State
Posted on30. Aug, 2011 by Braga.
Have you ever seen a squirrel just after it was hit by a car? It’s still alive and most of it still functions, but one part of it, most likely a back leg, is clearly messed up beyond salvation. It’s in shock, but it somehow gathers itself enough to crawl towards the gutter, trying to [...]
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16 days until September 3, do you know where Chip Kelly is? Gentlemen, let’s broaden our minds!
Posted on18. Aug, 2011 by Kinger.
We started this beautiful ride with 50 days to go, we’ve come too close to turn back. So implore you to stick with me on this petty little ride for just a little bit longer. Think about it, in just two short weeks from now you’ll be laying out your Friday Duck wardrobe (hopefully it [...]
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The voice of the Beavers Mike Parker hammered eating some tasty napkins at Denny’s
Posted on11. May, 2011 by SKI.
A proud day to be a Beaver. I’m not going to crush Parker that much for this video, because we’ve all been there. 3am, hammered, stumbling around town when you spot a Denny’s and feel the need for a short stack. Who hasn’t been there? The only difference is most of the time you are [...]
